Cory: There's no such thing as good news before I've had my Grape Nuts.
Cory: We're gonna have a child? Wait, we've only kissed! I mean, I knew I was a good kisser, but wow...
Eric: Okay Coreena, I don't know how to say this, so I'm going to choose my words very carefully. I think you're a psycho. I want to get as far away from you as I possibly can.
Coreena: What?
Eric: I'm just not the guy for you. You need a guy who's happy, and perky all the time. Maybe a guy whose had part of his brain removed and he thinks he's a bunny, and you can go off and be bunnies together.
Coreena: I don't know what Uncle David could've possibly meant by life experience. I'm 18 years old. I've been to sleep-away camps... I even got on the wrong bus once. I had a goldfish who died.
Eric: Suicide, was it?
Eric: I said to myself, Kyle...sometimes I like to call myself Kyle.
[John Turner's in a coma]
Shawn: John, how could you be in here? How could you screw up on your bike? I have never seen you screw up on anything. I'm the screw-up, remember? C'mon you remember...Don't do this to me, John. I don't do alone real good... I know you're in there but it's like you're not really here. You're not talking but I know you're here. So I'm just gonna talk, you can listen.
Shawn: John, even when I was at the Centre, it was all the things you taught me that made me wonder if it was the right place for me or not. But you didn't teach me enough. You, and Cory, and my parents, and the Matthews and the handful of people who really care about me, so don't blow me off, John!
[Looks up]
Shawn: Don't blow me off, God! I never asked you for anything before and I never wanted to come to you like this, but don't take Turner away from me; he's not yelling at me yet. God, you're not talking but I know you're here, so I'm gonna talk, and you can listen.
[pause]
Shawn: God, I don't wanna be empty inside anymore.
awwwwww that one always gets me :*(
Jack: Eric?
Eric: [dressed like Noah] No. not Eric, not anymore.
Jack: Ok, that's fine... ok what's your name... now?
Eric: Plays With Squirrels.
Mr. Feeny: Mr. Matthews?
Eric: Mr. Squirrels.
Cory: Eric?
Eric: Plays With.
Eric: See, duckies are good, cuz not only do they give you that non-threatening sense of security, but you can feed 'em crackers and you can ride 'em. See, duckies are the horsies of the ocean. No, I mean they are.
Cory: Okay, someone explain to me about duckies before I hit him with a spoon.
Amy Matthews: It's wallpaper.
Topanga: It's adorable.
Alan: It's for your room.
Eric: DUCKIES RULE!
Angela: My soap opera name is Shinaynay Martin Luther King Boulevard... Boy, I gotta get some black friends.
Cory: Shawn, I refuse to believe anything from those idiotic supermarket tabloids.
Shawn: It's the New York Times, baby.
Cory: The New York Times trailer park edition!
Shawn: It's exactly the same thing, except you can eat it!
Amish man: Hello, young man. Are you in need of a ride? I'm going to that farmhouse, there. [he points]
Cory: That farmhouse there? [points]
Amish Man: That farmhouse, there. [pointing]
Cory: Well I'm going to Philadelphia.
Amish Man: Wll, I can take you as far as that farmhouse there. [points]
Cory: Yes, but you see, I'm going to Philadelphia, so that really does me no good.
Amish Man: That may be, but, my will is just and my heart is pure.
Cory: ...Which also does me no good.
Cory: When I'm here with you I'm fine, but over there with Topanga it's like.. I'm a.. a sea monkey.
Shawn: That's a bad animal.
Cory: That's just what I want- to be Topanga's boyfriend. And then we can name our children Chubaka and Plankton!
Morgan Matthews: Mommy, if my dolly is cold, can I put her in the toaster oven?
Amy Matthews: No, Morgan, that would be a mistake.
Morgan Matthews: Mommy, I made a mistake.
Shawn: Remember the goldfish I used to have?
Cory: The turtle?
Cory: Someday, Topanga's gonna be a mother, and Im gonna be the father. Or the uncle. Or the way I'm goingm the guy down the street with the binoculars.
Shawn: No kissy?
Cory: Just talky!
Shawn: Well, love is the most rare and precious thing in the whole world.
Topanga: Have you ever fallen in love?
Shawn: About 5 times a day.
Eric: Guess who's got pictures of Cory running naked thru the sprinkler?
Cory: Eric, I was four.
Eric: You were twelve.
Cory: It was.. refreshing.
[discussing how nice Mr. Turner's bike is]
Frankie: You could eat it.
Joey: You mean "eat off it.'
Frankie: I said what I said.
Cory: It's hard to imagine you as a boy. Did your parents call you Mr. Feeny?
Eric: My grades aren't good enough to get me into college?
Mr. Feeny: Your grades aren't good enough to get you a Slurpee.
[trying to straighten Cory's hair]
Cory: Is this stuff supposed to be burning?
Shawn: Why, is it burning?
Cory: No, I was just trying to make conversation, because we don't get enough chances to talk anymore.
Eric: [sees a spider on his arm] What do you think Mr. Birdy?
Eric: [slurred] Birdy bit me.. left side paralyzed.. losing consciousness..
Cory: It was raining.. you had an umbrella.. I grabbed it, stuffed it down your throat, and then I opened it! Shawn, I Mary Poppinsed ya!
Eric: It was one of those nights. You know the kind. Like day, but darker.
Amy Matthews: Thirty minutes.
Cory: Half an hour.
Amy Matthews: Deal.
Topanga: Do you think this is funny?
Cory: No, I think it's the opposite of funny. I think it's... wood.
Topanga: Deep down, I'm shy too! I'm a wounded bird. Me and Schnider are wounded birds!
Eric: Sneak-attack! I learned how to sneak attack! Shh! I learned that when a girl beats you up, and I'm not saying any names, Opanga-Tay! That's code, shh... I learned that you never let that girl know exactly when you're gonna sneak attack her, hehe! [to Topanga] I'm gonna get you! Tomorrow at 3'oclock, I'm gonna sneak attack you!
Cory: We gotta meet!
Shawn: Where?
Cory: Paris!
Shawn: Are you kidding? That's the first place she'd look!
there's like 50 billion more quotes that i hafta add so i'll do that later
Hey Tom! haha
